VBS

the kid: mommy, God has amazing power.
me: yes, He does.
the kid: and He can do anything.
me: yep.
the kid: nothing is too difficult for God.
me: you're right. how did you get so smart?
the kid: I learned it at VBS. didn't you know that?

*gotta love VBS!*

click it or ticket

me: so what happens if you drive faster than the speed limit? 
the kid: click it or ticket!

backseat driver

the kid: speed limit 40. daddy, how fast are you going?
the hubby: 38.
the kid: good job, daddy. don't drive too fast. if you start going 40, slow down a little bit so a police officer doesn't have to come and give you a ticket. 
the hubby: thank you, mr. backseat driver.
the kid: you're welcome. I like helping you, daddy.

road work ahead

the kid: road work ahead. mommy, what does it mean when it says "road work ahead"?
me: it means there are people working on the road and we need to be careful.
the kid: daddy, that sign said road work ahead. so you have to be careful, okay daddy? pay extra close attention. got it, daddy?
the hubby: got it. thanks.
the kid: you're welcome.

wasn't me!

going through Monroe, LA...

the kid: phew! daddy, did you toot?
the hubby: no. that smell's coming from outside the car.
the kid: really?! mommy, is that true?
me: yep.
the kid: daddy, drive faster so we can get out of here. It smells like someone pooped their pants, and I don't like it.

speed limit

the kid: speed limit 70, daddy.
the hubby: oh good. that's how fast I'm going.
the kid: you're going 70?! don't go any faster, daddy. that would be bad.

the guessing game

the kid: daddy, how many letters in "hello"?
the hubby: five.
the kid: okay. (pause) daddy, I'm thinking of a five letter word.
:)

hair makes the boy

me: should I get my hair cut like yours?
the kid: no! 'cause then you'd be a boy. without a penis.

last day of school

I went to pick up the kid from school, and my heart skipped a beat when his teacher said, "bye, first grader." WOW! 

and as we were getting into the car...

the kid: I can't believe this is the last day of school!
me: I know. crazy, isn't it?
the kid: I'm going to miss coming to school.
me: me, too.
the kid: and I'm going to miss Mrs. Smith. I wish she could be my first grade teacher.
me: me, too, buddy. me, too.

best buddies

the kid was so excited to see that his "best buddy", who has been out sick the last few days, was at school today. he actually jumped out of his seat and said, "yay!" when he saw his friend. what a great way to end the school year - hanging out with his best buddy all day.

the most important lesson

the kid: mommy, God knows everything.
me: yes, He does.
the kid: and God is everywhere. all at the same time.
me: yep.
the kid: so we never have to be afraid. because he's always watching over us. 
me: that's right.
him: thank you for teaching me that. I love you, mommy. and daddy, too. because he teached me it, too.
me: you're welcome, honey. we love you, too.

*happy sigh*

dehydrated!?!

me: you need to drink your juice, honey. we don't want you to get dehydrated.
the kid: dehydrated!?! I don't want that to happen. 'cause that's when you poop a lot.
me: um, you're thinking about diarrhea. dehydrated means you don't have enough fluid in you and you get all dried up.
the kid: dried up and pooping a lot?! that's really not good.

*he drank all of his juice (gatorade) and asked for more*